I Didn't Realize Just How Much I Took for Granted

September 14, 2022

I'm not going to sugar coat it. Judging solely by social media, it would be so easy to assume that living in Florence is like a picture-perfect party 24/7. Of course, the image of living abroad that's curated online seems flawless. Nobody wants to advertise the hard days, the dreaded walks home after a particularly stressful class, the overwhelming panic that comes with being stranded at a bus stop, God knows where.

I knew this adventure would be humbling. I anticipated having difficulty acclimating, considering I've never really lived anywhere but sunny SoCal. But I don't think I fully understood exactly what challenges were ahead. Simple things I took for granted back home, like grocery shopping or laundry, became astronomically harder after moving to Europe. Shall I elaborate?

The other day, my roommate and I decided to hit the local supermarket after class to grab some groceries. Feeling so good about ourselves and our decision to save money and eat at home, we boastfully strutted our way over to the Conad next to the Duomo, and armed our shopping carts with an array of tasty treats. From frozen pizzas to Oreos to laundry detergent, we were feeling great about our purchases. Maybe the kitchen would even start to feel like home! Here came the first culture shock: they don't bag your groceries for you in Italy. Which is no problem once you know that this is a cultural norm here. But when you are just standing there, waiting, like an obnoxious tourist, the people behind you get frustrated. The nice lady behind the counter starts to get irritated, too. She mutters something in Italian I don't understand. The gentleman behind me wants his turn already. Finally, I bag my items, pay, being sure to recite ecco a lei! (here you go!) as I hand over my card, as to not be rude. Walk out, take a deep breath. This was just something I needed to experience. You live and you learn. All better, right?

Wrong. My stupidity didn't end there. I somehow forgot about the part where I don't live in California anymore, and I can't just put my groceries in the back of my car and be on my way. So, long story short, I had to walk about two miles with six bags of groceries, pretty much everything falling out of torn bags. Several kind locals and tourists offered to help me home. I was humiliated. But I thought more about it, and this too was a lesson. Next time I'll remember the intrinsic goodness of people who are willing to help, and I'll be sure to do the same for somebody else. (Also I'll just go to a closer grocery store and bring more bags lol).

I wish I could say this was the end of the culture shock whirlwind. Nope. I won't go into every detail, but to make a very long story short, I went to Ikea today (5 miles away) and it took five hours. I got stranded at two bus stations. Three buses didn't even show up. Eventually, my roommate and I got on the right bus. We figured out how to buy tickets and validate them. We laughed our faces off as we stood in the middle of the bus, struggling to stand up straight as it swerved around the city streets. Did we look like absolute psychopathic tourists? Yes. Will I also cherish that memory for the rest of my life? Most definitely.

I got home, attempted to do laundry, accidentally flooded the entire bathroom, and, unsurprisingly, felt very defeated. For about five minutes. Until I realized that all of it was a lesson. Every single mistake I made brought me one step closer to acclimating. Every bus missed brought me one step closer to getting on the right bus next time. It's all a reminder to stop taking what I have at home for granted. A car, a dryer, air conditioning. All of these things I once thought I couldn't live without become so obsolete once you realize that they are luxuries, not necessities. I realized today that had I grown up this way, without all of the luxuries I have back home, I wouldn't question for one second whether or not this lifestyle is doable. It is. It can be done. It just takes patience and being willing to make mistakes and embrace that the hard days are some of the most important ones.

I'm not writing this post to complain about these silly, little mishaps. Rather, I'm writing this because as I think back on these experiences, all I can do is laugh. What was embarrassing or devastating or frustrating yesterday, is nothing but funny today. And it'll be even funnier tomorrow.

I hope that some of my friends here in Florence read this post and realize that they aren't alone. This isn't easy. But how lucky are we to get to experience this? The duality is a confusing one. On the one hand, we're all so grateful to be doing this. On the other hand, it's so easy to sweat the small stuff. So here's my advice: give yourself a minute. Or five. Or maybe even an hour. Break down, sweat the small stuff. Get frustrated by the change. But then, you have to pick yourself back up. Because if we don't look at the bigger picture, we're going to miss the beauty that is quite literally at our fingertips.